Mardi Humphreys

Financial Infidelity

Back in March, we discussed financial fidelity. In the section on transparency, I alluded to the fact that hiding money from our spouses is cheating, but that was a whole ‘nuther post. Well, here it is.

As of January 2020, 44% of Americans with joint finances, cheated on our spouses with money. Anything hidden is considered cheating. For example: secret bank accounts (savings or checking), secret lottery winnings, secret debt (credit cards, loans), lost our job but acting like we didn’t, or spending money on an expensive item without discussion, can all be considered breaches of faith. Here are some behavioral tells to watch for: our spouse insists on paying all the bills, won’t divulge account logins, refuses to discuss money, or argues about spending large sums.

Why the deception?

Control: revenge spending
Guilt: knowing the spending was irresponsible
Fear: afraid of spouse’s reaction if discovered
Conflict Avoidance: we want something our spouse will object to

What’s the harm?

Lying about finances causes arguments, distrust, and can end the relationship. If we lie about money, what else will we lie about? Hiding money only delays the inevitable conversation about motive. If concealing debt is the issue, it could affect both spouses’s employment. Hiring managers check credit scores as part of the interview process. We shouldn’t have to tell each other every time we buy a venti at Starbucks, but we can’t run up $50K in credit card bills and keep it a secret. That will undermine the whole relationship. Some states’ laws make our finances our spouses’ finances. If the relationship ends and one spouse is in debt, both live with the responsibility until the debts are paid.

How do we fix it?

If we are the cheated, put aside judgement, and ask about the feelings that led to the deceit. Financial infidelity is a symptom. The real problem in the relationship needs acknowledgement. If we are the cheater, be honest, apologize, and stop keeping secrets. To begin, we can talk about tolerance. Can we spend $500 without asking? Can we divert $100 a week from our joint checking account to a private savings account? Our partner needs to know our motivation for having a separate account. Do we want to save up so we can spend money however we want without asking, or are we secretly saving up for a divorce? (In some states it’s illegal to hide money during a divorce, btw.) We don’t have to give our spouses access to this account, but they should know how much is in it because it’s a factor in our financial decision making. Define long term savings goals together like the children’s education, a new car, or retirement, and both commit to working toward them. When we want something that will impact those goals, it’s time for another discussion. We should revisit savings goals once a year. Maybe during tax season since it’s a logical time to talk about finances. When we get into this habit, as the years pass, it gets easier to talk to our spouses about money.

Money is a major stressor in a relationship and talking about it can quickly turn into arguing about it which makes you avoid talking about it. But keeping secrets is usually a waste of your T.E.A.M. If we don’t talk to our partners about money, we’ll never figure out how to work together to manage and maximize it.

How do you broach the subject of money in your relationship? Please share in the comments section.

Multitasking = Multidistracting

Humans were never meant to multitask; that’s a computer’s job. The word was invented in 1965 referring to an IBM computer’s capabilities. We aren’t talking about listening to a podcast while on a run here. More like texting while driving a car. Have you been forced to multitask more than usual as we shelter from home during the Coronapocolypse? Answering email while home schooling while folding laundry during a teleconference, perhaps?

What we think of as multitasking (doing multiple tasks simultaneously) in reality, is task switching (doing multiple tasks in rapid succession). If we make a habit of task switching, we lose the ability to focus. If we lose the ability to focus, we lose the ability to learn. Multitasking robs us of the ability to separate relevant information from irrelevant details. It negatively impacts short term memory; the brain’s clipboard. Also known as working memory, it’s the brain’s power to contain and shape information for a limited time. It’s the foundation for all thought processes; from memorizing your spouse’s favorite Chipotle order to learning how to code. The data suggests it takes longer to finish multiple tasks and we make more mistakes than if we pay attention to each task individually. Habitually shifting our focus is mentally exhausting and makes us 40% less productive. Eventually the attention drag will burn us out.

Distractions like email and instant messages slow us down. It’s hard to avoid the temptation of the relentless barrage of information, but we’re probably fooling ourselves if we think we’re good at multitasking; 98% of us aren’t. Best practice is to focus on one thing at a time for a certain period of time; maybe try the Pomodoro Technique and guard that time as sacred. It will be difficult, but unless someone is bleeding, on fire, or hurt, no interruptions are allowed. When we can focus, get into a flow, and accomplish something, it lowers our stress. This means saying no to everything that is not the most important thing at the time. This seems limiting given everything we need to get done, but it actually allows us to employ Parkinson’s Law and be more productive. The word “priority” means one thing. Priorities is a made up word to indicate everything is important and must get done. (If your manager insists on using the word priorities, and suggests everything needs to be done right now, it’s time tor a 1:1.) What is the one thing that must get done today? That is the priority and we must give it our full attention. It’s non-negotiable. The work day revolves around it.

We can’t eliminate all of life’s interruptions, particularly if everyone is doing everything from home. Clients will have emergencies, technology will fail, our partners, children, fur babies, neighbors, (etc.) will need our immediate attention at some point during our work day. But we need to try to concentrate on doing one thing at a time as often as possible. Our mental health depends on it.

What strategy do you use to monotask? Please share it in the comments section.

In the Beginning

COVID-19 has cost some of my friends their jobs. After getting over the hurdle of finding a new position in a pandemic, now they have to adjust to new roles. Are you in the same situation? How can you successfully transition to your new company? Time to flex those soft skills like communication, emotional intelligence, and leadership.

Communication

However you want people to think of you (professional, kind, capable, etc), project those positive qualities from your very first interaction. Ideally, an on-site meeting will be arranged to introduce you to your team as part of your on-boarding, but if social distancing makes that impossible, on your first day, mask up and go around to greet them individually. Is your team remote? Request a teleconference. Ask each member about themselves, listen more than you talk, and take notes. Pay special attention to the way they talk about the company. It will give you insight into its culture. Coworkers are unlikely to be transparent since you’re a stranger, but you could ask: How does the team resolve conflicts? How does the company recognize success? How does your manager support your professional development goals?

Emotional Intelligence

Find out how your role interacts with everyone else’s. How do you support your team in their daily responsibilities? Offering to help is a good way to build trust, but be wary of coworkers trying to foist too many of their unwanted tasks onto you. It’s okay to respectfully establish boundaries. Identify someone you can go to with questions ranging from, “What is the dress code?” to “Is Sam asking me to do a task she is actually responsible for?” Ask your most important questions. For the ones that aren’t so important, try to find the answers on your own. Look through the employee handbook, internal website, and on-boarding materials. If you can’t find answers, make a list and ask the appropriate people later. You don’t have to have all the answers now, and it will give you a reason to follow up with new colleagues. If you ask a question via email, you can prevent repeatedly asking the same one. If one of your questions regards how soon you can take time off (either paid or unpaid), best practice is to work 90 days before requesting it. Beware of office gossips. This early in your employment, they can only hurt your reputation. If you had a specific way of handling your projects at your last job, this is the time to be flexible. Until you’ve earned both the company’s and your manager’s trust, don’t demand changes.

Leadership

At a mentoring event in January 2020, Cassie Barlow, an outstanding leader in workforce development, reminded us a new role isn’t new just for the employee; it’s a transition for the whole team. She offered this great advice when starting a new job:

First day: Find yourself in the organizational chart, learn names (use mnemonic devices (e.g., Melissa has red glasses) to help you remember), be humble, have a growth mindset, be curious.

First week: Get a job description; meet colleagues and figure out how to interact with them. Who likes email? Who’d rather get a phone call? Who needs to meet?

First month: Set expectations, metrics, and milestones with your manager. Set expectations, metrics, and milestones with your direct reports.

Do you have any advice for starting a new position? Please share it in the comments section.

Remember the Future

I discovered Chronesthesia while listening to Adam Grant’s WorkLife podcast. He interviewed Astronaut Scott Kelly who used it to deal with living at the International Space Station for 340 days. Grant described how it can help us cope with both living and working at home during COVID-19. Here is the article Grant wrote about Mr Kelly. It goes into more detail than the podcast episode. Chronesthesia was first proposed by Endel Tulving in 1985. It’s the concept of mental time travel. Now that we’ve lived in this pandemic over four months, it seems like a good time to acquire this skill.

What Is It?

Chronesthesia is the theory our brains are constantly aware of the past and future simultaneously. It combines episodic memory and mental time travel. Episodic memory is linked to time and provides data from our past. Mental time travel is the ability to use past events to conceptualize future events.

How Does It Work?

Like the Red Queen in Alice in Wonderland who remembered the future, Chronesthesia involves two sets of processes. One set pertains to space: the who, what, and where of an incident. (E.g., we remember eating lunch yesterday: what we ate, where we ate it, whom we were with) The other set of processes pertains to time: the when. (E.g., did we eat lunch, yesterday, today, or tomorrow?) Chronesthesia theorizes the second set of processes is subjective. It’s mental time unmeasured by clocks or calendars. Consequently, our brains can travel in it and use it to shape our futures.

What Can Happen When We Try It?

Cons:

Worry – Chronesthesia offers plenty of opportunity to dwell on the negative. For example, looking forward to traveling to Orlando, Florida for vacation, but worrying about catching COVID-19 because it’s a hot spot.

Frustration – Our visualization may not be flexible enough. For example, a client agreed to an in-person brainstorming session. We mentally rehearse for a week prior. We see ourselves at a whiteboard using a rainbow of dry erase markers. At the last minute, the client wants to switch to a teleconference.

Overthink – Pondering what could happen denies the pleasure of living in the moment. For example, fretting over the pipeline instead of celebrating a finished project.

Pros:

Adjusting – We can learn from the past and use that knowledge to change future behavior. For example, if we know a coworker gossiped about us last week, we’ll be very careful what we say in front of him today.

Marketing – Remembering the future is great for storytelling. For example, recall how your company helped a client. List the facts, their problem, and your solution. Then, think about the result. How did it make the client feel? Tell their story in a case study. Attach the positive emotions they felt to what you can do for future clients.

Goal Setting – Chronesthesia is a natural exercise for setting goals. For example, your career isn’t going the way you want. Travel back in your memory. Was there a project/client/offer you turned down that negatively altered your career’s trajectory? Think about why you turned it down. Imagine accepting that offer instead. What would the work be like? What skills/certifications/contacts would you need to succeed? Set S.M.A.R.T. goals to get them. Envision yourself achieving those goals.

What memories can you project into the future to help you keep moving your career forward during this pandemic? Please share in the comments section.

How Much Will You Pay for Peace of Mind?

My husband and I are on that step of the parenting journey where we have to explain realities to our daughter like 401k plans, insurance, and taxes. Insurance is a really tricky one. Why pay hundreds of dollars for something you may not need? Because life happens and we have to protect ourselves from financial ruin when it does. Here are a couple of questions we’ve answered.

What Even IS Insurance?

My grandmother used to say, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Insurance is the ounce of prevention. We buy it before we need it, which is kind of backwards, right? We don’t buy dog food before we adopt a dog, but we do buy homeowners insurance before our house burns down because insurance companies won’t pay for a fire we’ve already had. It’s also weird in that insurance companies decide whether or not they want to insure us and how much they will charge us to do so. For example, when buying car insurance, if we have a crash on our record, the insurance company can charge us more than they charge someone who has never had an accident. Here is a comprehensive article about insurance.

What Kind of Insurance do I Really Need?

There are so many options. We can practically insure everything we own if we want to. Some insurance we are required to purchase. For example, it’s illegal to drive without car insurance. Some is optional; like pet insurance. So what are the essential types of insurance we should buy? It depends on our situations and who relies on our incomes. We work hard for our money and want to keep as much of it as possible. The following are common types of insurance and resources you can use to decide what’s best for your situation.

Health – Premiums, deductibles, and copays, oh my! There are so many variables associated with health insurance, there’s not enough room to go into them in this space. Here is a good article about them.

Dental – It depends on whether or not your employer provides it. Here is a good explanation.

Disability – According to the CDC, 61 million adults in America have a disability. You need long-term disability insurance. You can use your emergency fund for short term (lasting 3-6 months) disabilities, but here is a resource to help you decide.

Life – Should you choose term or whole life? Depends on what you want the insurance to pay for after you’re gone. Here is a good explanation.

Pet – We opt to use our emergency fund or credit card instead, but here is a resource for you.

Homeowners or Renters – Covers property damage (e.g., you get robbed) and liability (e.g., someone gets hurt on your property). Here is a resource for homeowners, and here is one for renters.

Flood – In most cases, yes. Neither homeowners nor renters insurance cover flooding. Here is an article about it.

Auto – It’s the law. Here is an article to help you decide what type is best for you.

Umbrella – Are you at risk of getting sued? Then yes. More details here.

Long-term Care – Probably not. Here is an explanation.

Identity Theft – Probably not. Here is why.

Have you had a circumstance where you were really glad you were insured? Please share about it in the comments section.

Meeting Manners

Photo by August de Richelieu from Pexels

Finding and maintaining business relationships is so important it has its own word: networking. Pre-COVID-19, the default technique was in person, in a group, with snacks. Meeting people powers business. We get together to build trust, show respect, demonstrate commitment, and form long term relationships. When we connected with someone, we’d further the conversation at a later date, either at one of our offices or restaurant.

When instructed to shelter at home, we immediately virtualized it, but now we’re dipping our toes back into the networking and 1:1 meeting ponds. It’s not unusual to run from a teleconference in my home office to a 1:1 at a coffee shop.

This transition is exhausting, but it helps when I remember guidelines for COVID-19 change daily for the entire world. We can’t realistically absorb all the available information, and no one has all the answers. We can have patience, extend grace, and be prepared to pivot. For example, when setting an appointment we acknowledge we’d rather meet in person, but offering a teleconference as a back up is currently the best practice.

We could just talk on the phone. (Remember when talking to someone was the only thing we did with phones?) I had a couple of 1:1 calls recently and they were refreshing! Eliminating the sense of sight allowed me to concentrate on the person’s voice and take notes. I didn’t have to wonder if I was using enough non-verbals to show I was paying attention. I had to remind myself to respond with verbal cues (e.g.,“uh-huh,” “yes,” “tell me more,” etc.) so the speaker would know I was listening. It was a great communication exercise.

When we meet face to face, it’s prudent to call the venue ahead and ask if they allow indoor seating yet. If they have outdoor seating, that’s even better, but requires the weather to cooperate. We should move our chairs six feet apart. If we purchase drinks or food, we should pay with our credit/debit card. We should wear a mask, carry hand sanitizer, not shake hands (and maybe comment on it; e.g., “I hope someone comes up with a substitution for handshaking soon.”) We should take our temperatures before leaving the house (and tell our 1:1s upon arrival). We should be prepared for cancellations as COVID-19 conditions daily change.

Now that we’ve had over three months experience with teleconferencing, here is something I’ve found useful. Begin the meeting at five minutes after the hour or half hour and end five minutes before the hour or half hour. Odds are the person meeting with me is coming from an earlier meeting, and/or has another one after ours. Giving them five minutes to transition demonstrates consideration for their schedule.

Respect is the key, both giving it and requesting it. When choosing whether to meet in person or virtually, it’s fair to say, “I’d rather teleconference. My family is taking social distancing very seriously.” We should also not be surprised to hear that sentence from the person we intend to meet. COVID-19 is turning into a marathon rather than a sprint. Minding our meeting manners is a small way we can help each other to the finish line.

Are the majority of your meetings still virtual? Please tell us about them in the comments section.

Stalled Boundary

Last week during a local weather forecast, a meteorologist described the stationary front hanging over us. She explained there were two air masses competing for dominance and until one got strong enough to replace the other, it would continue to rain. Doesn’t this sound like some of our work relationships?!

Two Masses Competing for Dominance

The word seems to imply an attempt to isolate ourselves, but boundaries are guidelines we communicate so others know how to treat us. We’re stating the behaviors we’ll tolerate and those we won’t. We’re setting expectations for the team. If we have well defined boundaries, it takes assuming out. “No” is a powerful word, and we need to get comfortable using it. We want to get along with our coworkers. We don’t want to seem rude, ill-mannered, or not a team player; but anyone with the attitude, “It never hurts to ask,” has been told no before. People are going to think what they want about us (positive or negative) no matter what we do, so let’s say no to things that make us exhausted, disturbed, or resentful.

Both Equally Strong

We can’t make anyone respect our boundaries. All we can control is how we respond when they’re crossed. When we’re pushed to defend our boundaries, it’s an opportunity to articulate why they exist. Some boundaries are negotiable and being questioned about them helps us refine them. For example, Coworker: “Why didn’t you reply to the email I sent you yesterday?” Me: “Because I stop checking email at 7:00PM.” This encounter reminded me our boss sends emails at all hours. So I refined my boundary by setting up a rule in Outlook. When our boss emails me, Outlook sends me a text. A long justification of our boundaries isn’t necessary nor is it anyone’s business. If we offer too much explanation, we invite the encroacher to move it. Remember, turnabout is fair play. We should be mindful of our coworkers’ boundaries. How can we tell when we’ve crossed one if they won’t point it out? There may be visual social clues: heavy sighing, arm crossing, eyebrow raising. When I suspect I’ve crossed a boundary, I ask. “Do I sense a boundary? Oops, the line’s behind me. I crossed it again.”

Everyone Gets Rained On

We can’t afford to feel guilty about how our reasonable boundaries affect the peace of our team. Modeling calm, matter-of-fact boundary defense may be the best thing we can do for our team. When we hold a boundary, let’s observe our coworkers’ reactions. Are they inspired? Relieved? Annoyed? Scared? Their responses give us a major clue about the health of our teams’ communication. Do we need a culture shift? Is it time for one member to transfer to a different team? Let’s strive to foster an environment where coworkers feel safe to disagree and debate, but non-stop criticism doesn’t promote problem solving. Leaving the team or asking someone to leave is not a pleasant choice, but it’s important to remember the choice exists. We aren’t powerless.

What are some work boundaries you’ve had to defend? Please share them in the comments section.

Control is an Illusion

For many of us, it’s a long holiday weekend to celebrate Independence Day. But thanks to COVID-19, I don’t feel very independent. I walk out the door then stop to make sure I have my mask. Before setting an appointment for a one-on-one, I have to call coffee shops and ask if they allow indoor seating. To go to the office, or not to go to the office; that is the question. Maybe I should take some time between Hamilton viewings to reflect, reality check, remaster, and renew.

Reflect

Gratitude is my default setting for pulling out of rumination. I keep a gratitude journal and write in it as part of my morning routine. I record one thing I’m grateful for from the previous day. When I start down the rabbit hole of feeling sorry for myself, I pull out the gratitude journal to snap out of it. I habitually focus on my goal and ignore the journey I’m on to reach it. Achieving the goal is fabulous, but wisdom comes from what I do daily to accomplish it.

Reality Check

Have you seen a bunch of memes on your social media feeds that say the most useless purchase of 2019 was a 2020 planner? It’s funny because it’s true. The goals we set at the beginning of this year are mostly impractical now. Yet, we beat ourselves up for not being on track to reach them. For example, my company planned to grow our new division this year. We’re having difficulty getting traction and I blamed myself. So, I turned to my best networking friends for a reality check. I felt better when they validated business is slow for everyone. This prompted me to refocus my outreach. What are my clients’ biggest needs right now? Can I provide a resource for them even if it’s not my company? If I can help my community get through the pandemic, then they will still be around to talk business post COVID-19.

Remaster

Much like a rock band re-recording an old hit song to improve its quality, let’s revise our yearly goals. We can break them down into smaller goals to help us stay motivated. We can concentrate on short term goals. (E.g., ask ourselves, “What is one thing I can I do today?”) We can break our revised goals down into actionable steps and calendar them so we’re triggered to action. When contemplating a new goal, we should ask ourselves,“Is this reasonable during COVID-19?” We can track our efforts (you know I’ll use any excuse to start a spreadsheet) and review them after Q3. We can identify someone willing to be an accountability partner and check in with each other weekly for progress reports.

Renew

Surviving COVID-19 is a marathon. Small daily acts of self-care (take a walk, read an article, listen to a podcast) can be rewards for taking another step toward our goals. Setbacks feel more painful right now, but let’s hold on, keep trying, and support one another.

How are you reflecting on the first half of 2020 and preparing for the second? Please share your ideas in the comments section.

Hiding in Plain Sight

Like Donna Summer, we work hard for the money and we need to manage it. Otherwise, it will manage us. We want to get to a point in our financial lives where we can pay our credit card balances off every month, pay cash to replace a dead refrigerator, and take that spontaneous long weekend trip without feeling guilty about how much we spend on it. A budget is a useful tool for that. Here are some options. After choosing the right plan for us, we need to take into account expenses that may be hiding in plain sight.

Let’s begin by recalling the conspicuous items a budget should include (along with a few examples):

Food, clothing, and shelter for the entire family
Childcare
Utilities (electricity, gas, water, sewage, trash removal, recycling removal, cell phone (including data), internet, cable tv)
Transportation (gas, oil changes, car loan, repairs, insurance, registration, car wash, parking, tolls, roadside assistance, public transportation, ride-hailing)
Medical Copays for the entire family (office visits, dentist visits, prescriptions, dermatologist visits, eye exams, lab work, therapists, urgent care)
Minimum monthly debt payments (student loans, credit cards)
Savings both short term and long term (emergency fund, vacation, children’s college, retirement)

Whew! Okay. Breathe.

Now, here are some items that may not occur to us when we are budgeting, but should (along with a few examples):

Haircuts for the entire family
Pets (grooming, veterinarian visits, medication, accessories (leashes, waste bags, cat litter, sweaters), food, boarding, toys)
Subscriptions (Netflix, Box subscriptions, Spotify, Playstation Plus, Amazon Prime)
Self-care
Property taxes
HOA fees
Makeup
School (supplies, pictures, private school uniforms, sports (including uniforms, participation fees, and equipment), band (including uniforms, participation fees, and instruments), teacher gifts, fundraisers, field trips, enrollment fees)
Lawn care (mowing, weed killing, landscaping, pest control)
Coffee and/or Fast Food and/or happy hour
Out-of-town guests (if they are staying with you, you are using more water, electricity, food, transportation, entertainment)
Physical fitness (home equipment (weights, treadmill, stationary bike) memberships to gym, yoga studio, classes)
Bank account fees (overdrafts, transfers, low account balances) if this is a significant expense for you, you might consider taking your banking to a credit union
Gifts (holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day)
Dues (union, fraternity/sorority, professional organizations, licenses, certifications, continuing education credits)
Charitable contributions
Software/Apps

How much we spend on these items is very personal. We also have to take our spouse’s needs, wants, and opinions into consideration. No one wants to feel financially deprived. On the other hand, no one wants to lie awake at night worrying about how we’re going to pay the bills, either. This shutting down of the economy has gone on so long that we are now in the second wave of layoffs. Some companies who managed to avoid furloughing workers, now have to ask their employees to take pay cuts or be laid off or both. When so many have lost their jobs, and those who didn’t feel overworked from home, (or tense on the front lines) forgotten budget expenses are unpleasant surprises.

Are there items that should be on this list that I missed? Please share them in the comments section.

It’s Alright to be Wrong

Father’s Day has me thinking about how patient my dad was.

There was the time I:

woke the whole house by climbing up in the attic and walking on the creaky floor over my parents’ bedroom early one morning
overcorrected a turn and drove into a yard at the top of a hill while learning to drive
flushed an item down the toilet and clogged the septic tank

These mistakes were explained to me (usually) calmly and corrections were requested (usually) just as calmly. He made me feel like I made a mistake, not like I was a mistake. There’s a big difference and it’s easy to miscommunicate. He made sure I knew my imperfections didn’t stop him from loving me. How often do we beat ourselves up because we feel like we failed? Three instances occur to me.

Failed Goals

When setbacks happen at work, it helps to remember our past successes. (If you don’t keep a success list for performance reviews, start. Now.) After reassuring ourselves, let’s reframe. This isn’t a failure, it’s an experiment. Was it a S.M.A.R.T. goal? Can we extend the deadline? Do we need additional resources to reach it? What if we tweak the process? We can analyze the data, then make a decision.

Failed Expectations

I registered to attend a free webinar given by a colleague. It was his second one. For the first one, he requested my help cohosting and I assumed (you know what assuming does) he’d want help again. Then I discovered a meeting scheduled for the same time that I’d rather attend because I’d have an opportunity to invite those participants to a webinar I was presenting the following week. I was disappointed I couldn’t attend the meeting. Then, I thought. “Why can’t I?”

The angel on one shoulder argued with the devil on my other shoulder:

Angel: Because you made a commitment.

Devil: They’ll be another webinar next quarter. Cancel the registration.

Angel: Your colleague will want your help again.

Devil: He hasn’t asked for it.

Angel: But you always put others’ interests ahead of your own.

THAT did it. I decided to attend the meeting instead of the webinar and if people think less of me for choosing what’s best for me, so be it.

Failed First Try

The team shot down my first idea for the website refresh in the project meeting this week. Does that mean I shouldn’t suggest another one next week? Is everyone judging me? Should I give up trying to be creative because I’m obviously embarrassing myself? Truth: my team probably forgot about my idea as soon as they left the Zoom room. I can’t remember what Joe’s big-SEO-lead-magnet-idea-that-tanked at last week’s meeting was. No one is holding our imperfections against us; except us. Let’s throw out our fixed mindsets and adopt growth mindsets. What exactly was it about my idea the team didn’t like? Was there a kernel of the idea they did like? Can I cultivate it and bring a revised idea to next week’s meeting? Struggling reminds us we’re stretching. Let’s not allow our mistakes to define us.

What flavor of imperfection is bugging you this week? Please share in the comments section.