Goals – Page 4 – mardihumphreys.com

Money Wise

Your plan for keeping your children busy all summer is now in effect. Camps, your library’s summer reading program, maybe a summer job, will keep them occupied and gathering new input they can use during the next school year. Have you factored teaching them how to manage money into your summer plans?

The Sooner The Better

You may feeI they are too young to learn about budgeting, but spending and saving money is not really about money. It’s about how you feel about money. Even if your children’s school gave them an age-appropriate course on money management this year, don’t rely on it to teach them financial literacy. You want to be your children’s guide to managing both their emotions and expectations. By age three, most children recognize money. Between ages five and seven they understand the concept of working to get it, so start teaching money management skills from an early age and prepare to make money an ongoing conversation.

Practice, Practice, Practice

As your children mature, their critical thinking around money should too. For example, give your kindergartner a specific chore (e.g., putting their toys away) and a weekly allowance for it. Help your second-grader create a simple budget by labeling three envelopes: Spend, Save, Taxes. If they receive $10 every two weeks, then $8 goes to Spend, $1 goes to Save, and $1 goes to Taxes. You will have plenty of conversations about those envelopes over the course of the summer. You can introduce concepts like opportunity cost and delayed gratification. You can talk about the importance of thoughtful planning, disciplined spending habits and why you pay taxes. Let your middle-schooler eavesdrop on family finance discussions like, will the household budget allow you to go out to eat tonight? Buy a new car next month? Pay for extracurricular school activities next year? By the time you have a high-school freshman, it’s time to make borrowing money part of the conversation.

Give Them Some Credit

While it can be a powerful tool for achieving financial goals, borrowing requires being a bit of a futurist. You have to teach your teen to weigh the benefits of debt against its risks while simultaneously helping them avoid potential pitfalls. You can do this by teaching them how to manage credit cards. Your bank/credit union/financial institution can add a card for them to your account. You can set a credit limit, monitor their spending, and set their payment schedule. Now you have four years to help them practice determining how much debt is realistically sustainable given their income, expenses, and long-term goals. You expose them to concepts like interest rates and how much it really costs them when they don’t pay off their balance every month. The closer they get to graduating, the more concepts you can introduce. For example, what a FICO score is and how to keep an eye on it. If college is a goal, managing credit card debt gives your children practice for managing student loans. This is also a good time for your family to periodically evaluate your financial strategies, analyze current priorities, and question assumptions. For example, is going to college your child’s goal? What are the alternatives? Gap year? Internship? Trade apprenticeship? Full-time employment? In light of your financial situation, what makes the most sense? This type of discussion is a good example of when managing money is really about managing emotions and expectations rather than finances.

How do you teach your children to manage money? Please share in the comments.

Emotional Granularity

You’ve probably heard the advice that when you feel nervous, like before a presentation, you should tell yourself that you are not nervous, you are excited. By doing this, you turn the negative emotion into a positive one.

You’ve probably sat behind your computer trying to solve a difficult problem and suddenly your body feels like it ran a marathon. You think, “What is wrong with me? All I’ve done for the last hour is sit here and I’m exhausted.” When you feel frustrated, it’s not always because something is wrong, it may be because something is emotionally hard.

There is neuroscience behind these mindsets. For the health of your brain, as well as the rest of your body, take your process for dealing with your fight, flight, or freeze response a step further and recategorize stressful emotions.

What Is Emotional Granularity?

The next level of emotional intelligence is emotional granularity. It is the ability to precisely label your emotions at the time you are having them. This is a coping mechanism that helps you be more spontaneously resilient during a stressful situation. When you can recognize an emotion and label it, you can regulate it. You gain more control over the outcome of the situation you’re in at the time you are in it. While you can’t stop feeling emotions, you can decide how to act on them to create the results that most benefit you.

How Can You Use It?

You probably mentally place the label “negative” on the emotions you perceive as unpleasant. But emotions are neither positive nor negative. Emotions are electrical impulses in your brain signaling that what you’re experiencing is something you care about. For example, let’s say you are gearing up for your annual job performance review and you are dreading it. What would happen if you told yourself you feel determination instead of dread? You would be able to change your reality. You would prepare differently. If you dread, then maybe you avoid preparing for the review until the last minute because you don’t like the way it makes you feel. If you recategorize dread as determination, then as soon as your review date is scheduled, you pull out your Atta Baby file and revisit all the goals you met during the last year as well as the praise you received for your job performance. Now you have the documentation to remind the organization of your value. Now you have the confidence to prove your worth. Now that emotion is a force driving you to a more positive outcome.

Why Should You?

When you are in a situation that makes you feel anxious, your body is trying to tell you something. Instead of making a snap decision, stop and ask yourself why you feel the way you do. Paying attention to those feelings and getting curious about what is causing them gives you options for how to deal with them. The discomfort is rolling around in your brain anyway. You may as well catch the emotion, unravel it, and make it work for you.

How do you reframe your unpleasant emotions? Please share in the comments.

Underwhelmed

I was introduced to the concept of boreout in Adam Grant’s book, Hidden Potential, and it’s fascinated me ever since. You’ve heard of, and probably experienced, burnout caused by your job. It’s when you are exhausted by too much emotional, physical, and mental fatigue for too long. Boreout is the same exhaustion, but the cause is different. Instead of being overwhelmed by the stimulation of your job, you are underwhelmed by it.

What It Looks Like

You arrive at work each morning facing the same tasks you mastered ages ago. You complete a monotonous routine that offers no room for growth or innovation while constantly checking the clock and counting down the minutes until you can leave. There’s no challenge and no sense of accomplishment. You go through the motions while your skills stagnate, your creativity dwindles, and your enthusiasm decreases with each passing day. You feel apathetic and frustrated. These emotions can spill over into other areas of your life, affecting your relationships and overall well-being. Here are some questions to ask yourself if you suspect you’re suffering from boreout.

Is your comfort zone too comfortable?
Are you running on empty energy-wise?
Do you procrastinate more often?
Are you disengaged with your work and coworkers?
Is your productivity slipping?
Do simple tasks feel burdensome?
Do you feel indifferent to meeting deadlines or achieving goals?
Are you questioning the purpose of your role within the organization?
Do you feel like a cog in a machine rather than a valued contributor?
Has your job performance suffered?
Are you progressing on your career path?
Are you increasingly irritable?
Do you feel detached from friends and family?

How to Combat It at Work

Seek Challenges: Talk to your manager about taking on stretch assignments. Work with them to identify new projects or responsibilities that align with your capabilities. Ask where the skills gaps are on your team then volunteer to learn the competencies that are missing. Online courses, in-person workshops, and mentorship opportunities all broaden your skill set and keep you engaged. Increasing your knowledge base and your network both expands your comfort zone and breaks your cycle of boredom. Experimenting with new approaches to old challenges promotes continuous improvement, injects creativity into your work, and helps you build relationships. Host brainstorming sessions and collaborations with colleagues to spark fresh ideas and gather diverse perspectives. Explore unconventional paths to solutions together embracing failure as a learning opportunity rather than a setback. Everyone suffers from boreout at some point. Surround yourself with coworkers who inspire and motivate you so you can support and encourage each other when needed.

Set Goals: You don’t have to wait for your manager to give you something new to do. Set SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound) personal development goals for yourself, both short-term and long-term, that align with your values and career aspirations. Having something to work towards gives you a sense of purpose and direction. Break down larger objectives into manageable tasks, track your progress, and celebrate every completed step.

Establish Boundaries: Strive for healthy work-life integration by prioritizing self-care. Take regular breaks throughout the day to recharge and refocus. Go for a walk or do whatever helps you clear your mind and boost your energy level. Set, communicate, and protect non-business hours so you can disconnect from work to do things you enjoy and be with people you enjoy. BTW, if the only person you want to be with is you, that is valid!

How do you fight boreout? Please share in the comments.

Getting Directions

Customer success became one of my passions during the pandemic. I wondered what our users’ experience was with us. So, I asked them. What are your expectations? Are we, at the very least, meeting them? How can we bring more value to the relationship? Their answers to these questions were as unique as they were. Each of their journeys to us was different, but had three major themes in common.

Awareness

Customer success begins when a stranger turns into an acquaintance. It involves multiple touch points across various channels, including online platforms, events, and other customer’s opinions of their experience with you. How did they first connect with you? Social media? Word of mouth? Networking event? You have to collect data at each interaction and analyze it so you can personalize communications, services, and outcomes to encourage your potential customer’s engagement. This is a relationship. It’s personal. It’s unique. They expect tailored experiences based on their preferences. For example, did they see a post on LinkedIn promoting your monthly newsletter, then click through to your website and subscribe? Then they are interested in the content you provide. This is a good time to find out how clear your message is. Does this potential customer easily see your value proposition?

Anticipation

Do you have a process for onboarding customers? During discovery conversations, can you identify potential hurdles? Do they look confused when you list your offerings? Is the language in your proposal clear? Have you given them three ways to contact you at their convenience with questions? By anticipating their needs and challenges you can proactively address issues before they escalate. Ask them what their preferences are. How do they want to be communicated with? What are their goals? What does success look like? Then ask yourself: How do they benefit from working with you? Are they excited for check in meetings or do they keep cancelling? Monitor your customers’ behavior. It’s feedback you can use to identify patterns of frustration then quickly course correct. Use conflict as an opportunity to strengthen the relationship. Whatever you promised to do for them over deliver on time and on budget.

Advocacy

As you move through a project for your customer, continuously optimize their experience by making notes of what works and what doesn’t. Regularly review and update their customer journey map based on feedback, data analysis, and their evolving expectations. This helps you not only stay responsive to their changing needs and preferences, it also makes them want to work with you again and again. You craft such a superior experience, they reward you with their loyalty. They organically become your champion in the community. They write good reviews and refer their friends to you. At this point in the journey, you come full circle for how a new customer becomes aware of you: word of mouth.

People need stuff and they assign value to those who can give them what they need. By understanding a customer’s journey from awareness to advocacy, you can move more confidently through the know, like, and trust process.

What do you do to understand your customer’s journey? Please share in the comments.

Delayed Gratification

So far in this series, Let’s Get Critical, we’ve discussed what critical thinking is, how to use it at work, and how to demonstrate it to further your career. Let’s wrap up this series by applying critical thinking to managing your money.

Save

Now – Whether it’s a broken tooth or a broken car, you should have immediate access to $1500 to pay for unexpected expenses. You can apply critical thinking to save up an emergency fund. For example, most banks offer multiple accounts so you can segment your money for specific purposes. In addition to a debit account, open an adjacent account and label it Emergency Fund. Set up an automatic transfer of $25 a week from your debit account to your Emergency Fund. In one month you will have saved $100. In 14 months you will have saved $1500. Yes, it’s a long time. If you can save more aggressively, plus earn interest on the Emergency Fund, then you can do it faster.

Soon – If you’re dreaming about an extended vacation, planning to purchase a vehicle, or want to own your own home, critical thinking helps you break down your goal into manageable chunks, establish a timeline, and calculate how much you need to save each month to achieve it. For example, if you’re saving for a $20,000 down payment on a house within two years, you’ll need to set aside approximately $833 each month.

Later – For eventualities like retirement, critical thinking makes you consider factors like inflation, investment options, and your desired lifestyle in retirement. While you can’t predict the future, you can estimate how much your expenses will be and work backward to determine how much you need to save each month to reach those goals. Then you can research investments like IRAs, or 401(k)s and weigh their benefits against your risk tolerance and at what age you want to retire.

Spend

Budget – Pay attention to where your money goes by tracking your spending. This can be as simple as a weekly check of the transactions in your debit account on your bank’s app. Occasionally, maybe quarterly, pull data to see where your money goes over time. For example, do you spend more in the winter? Is it because of heating costs or holiday gifts? What expenses are non-negotiable? What extras can you cut back on without resentment? Armed with this analysis, critically think about where to adjust spending so you can strategically allocate funds to cover both essential expenses and discretionary spending.

Insurance – Just like you have to save for emergencies, you also have to spend for them. An emergency fund helps you pay for minor emergencies. Insurance protects you against major emergencies that could financially ruin you. Critical thinking means you stop and think about what you need to protect. Usually this includes your health, vehicle, and home. Now, how much protection do you really need? How much risk can you afford? Compare plans and premiums to balance cost with comprehensive protection.

How do you apply critical thinking to your money management? Please share in the comments.

Power Tool

Two weeks ago we began this series, Let’s Get Critical, by defining critical thinking. The following week we discussed how to use it at work. But does critical thinking benefit you personally if no one knows you can do it? How can you prove you are a critical thinker and use it to further your career?

Demonstrate

Ask – Curiosity is the fuel that powers critical thinking. You need to get past the symptoms of a problem to find its cause. What is your why? What is the context? How does it make you feel? What works well? What can be improved? What should you stop doing? Questions like these signal your mind is open to new ideas and new ways of doing things.

Listen – While someone is answering your questions, only break eye contact to take a brief note. Nod in acknowledgement when they emphasize a point. After they answer, reply with a paraphrase of what you heard them say. You don’t have to agree with their point of view, but you do have to consider it. Part of critical thinking is realizing just because you don’t like someone’s opinion does not mean they are wrong. Constructive dialogue requires you to suspend judgment, try to understand their assessment, and reach a consensus.

Change

Rethink – Critical thinkers do not accept the status quo. They challenge prevailing beliefs, uncover hidden agendas, and examine the rationale behind both. To accomplish this, embrace stretch assignments that force you out of your comfort zone. Intentionally work with colleagues from different departments, backgrounds, and cultures. This broadens your worldview, reveals your unconscious biases, and gives you new approaches to problem-solving.

Network – Get out of your organization and into your community. Attend industry conferences, roundtable discussions, and Special Interest Group (SIG) meetups. Engage in conversations with people who do what you do and people who use the products or services your organization provides. Get their feedback on what is going well for them as well as their pain points.

Learn

Educate – Getting a degree or certificate is a great accomplishment and it has an expiration date. To maintain your subject matter expertise, you have to learn a skill, use it, unlearn it, learn the new skill, use it, unlearn it, etc. To be a critical thinker, you must be adept at both gathering and integrating information from various sources of relevant and reliable data, pull key insights out of it, and test your conclusions. Regularly reflect on your choices. Think about your reasoning behind them. Consider the perspectives of those impacted by your decisions.

Fun – Engaging in activities that stimulate your mind also stimulate critical thinking. For example, reading a work of fiction while concurrently reading a work of non-fiction, attending non-work related workshops, doing Sudoku or crossword puzzles. Team bonding events where the goal is to relax and get to know one another help build the trust necessary to accept diverse viewpoints when it’s time to problem solve. When you are emotionally invested in someone, you want to collaborate with them.

For example: Let’s say you become known for asking good questions, thoughtfully listening, taking on stretch assignments, presenting at SIGs, and starting your organization’s leadership development book club. These all set you up to be an influencer who contributes innovative ideas, correctly analyzes complex issues, and makes informed decisions. Critical thinking makes you a valuable asset to any organization.

How do you demonstrate your critical thinking on the job? Please share in the comments.

Want to Know

Last week we began Let’s Get Critical, a four-part series on critical thinking, by defining what it is. Here in part two, let’s discuss why critical thinking is essential to your job performance.

Relationships

Business moves at the speed of trust. Active listening combined with critical thinking and empathy is one of the fastest ways to build trust. When you communicate your ideas clearly to your teammates, attentively listen to them, and respectfully debate with them, then your meetings are more likely to generate positive results. Building a safe space for everyone to contribute ideas not only facilitates effective productivity within your team but also across the organization. When you repeatedly give your subject matter expertise to anyone who asks for it everyone wants to know you.

Decisions

Critical thinking prevents knee-jerk reactions while helping you make wiser choices faster. Testing your assumptions breeds confidence because either you get confirmation that you are right or you find out you are wrong before you go telling a bunch of people. Identifying the various factors, considering their impact on people, processes, and performance, and predicting potential consequences for each all help you excel at solving problems efficiently. Banish the phrase, “because we’ve always done it that way,” from your mind. It squelches the culture of transformation your organization needs to survive. Instead make it a habit to question existing processes, listen to your team’s ideas, and propose low-risk experiments. Using critical thinking this way enables you to quickly grasp new concepts and adjust your strategies accordingly. This capability becomes more crucial as technology like Artificial Intelligence speeds up the pace of business evolution. Adapting to new challenges, identifying the opportunities in crises, and devising original conclusions require you to possess strong critical thinking skills because you have to navigate ambiguity, normalize change, and address challenges with clarity and precision. It is an organization’s critical thinkers who identify inefficiencies, brainstorm new ways to correct them, and drive the mission forward.

Future

Critical thinking is a power skill. It equips you with the tools and mindset necessary to thrive in today’s competitive job market. You help maintain a positive work environment conducive to productivity and innovation when you can:

Demonstrate your creative resourcefulness at problem solving
Think strategically and align your actions with your organization’s goals
Communicate complex concepts concisely and in easy-to-understand terms
Recognize when it is time to pivot, embrace change, and quickly learn new skills
Empathetically challenge both yours and others’ assumptions and welcome alternative perspectives
Actively seek feedback and regularly reflect on your experiences
De-escalate tensions, constructively resolve conflicts by seeking common ground, and facilitate meaningful dialogue to foster collaboration

For example, let’s say you are on a software development team troubleshooting a critical bug in a new application. Instead of resorting to quick fixes or assuming you know what is wrong, your team applies critical thinking skills to systematically diagnose the root cause of the issue. You conduct thorough analysis, dig through code repositories, and interview stakeholders to gather relevant information. Through rigorous testing and experimentation, you identify the underlying flaw, implement a sustainable solution, and document it to prevent similar issues from happening in the future.

Next week let’s talk about how you can demonstrate critical thinking skills to further your career. How does thinking critically help you do your job? Please share in the comments.

Enquiring Minds

I help people make decisions, but I do not give advice. (Does that qualify as irony?) Everyone’s circumstances are different and you have to do what makes sense for you. One of the most useful tools for figuring that out is learning how to think critically. For the next four weeks, we will explore both what critical thinking is and how you can use it to make wise choices regarding your time, energy, attention, and money. Here in part one of this four-part series titled, “Let’s Get Critical,” we take a minute to define it.

What Is It?

Critical thinking is your ability to analyze, objectively interpret, systematically evaluate, and integrate information to form reasoned judgments.
It’s like being a detective. You ask lots of questions, look for clues, and figure out the best solutions.
Acquiring knowledge is part of critical thinking, but you also have to be able to think logically, organize data, consider alternative perspectives, and discern between fact and opinion.
Critical thinkers are adept at dissecting complex problems, uncovering hidden variables, and making choices based on evidence.
Critical thinking requires you to recognize your assumptions, double check them with reliable sources, and test them to see if they are still valid.
It’s not about being skeptical. It’s about identifying the one great decision among all the good decisions and rethinking your opinion in light of new information.

What Can it Include?

Analysis: To solve a challenge using critical thinking, first organize the facts you gathered into categories like people, processes, and performance. Examine how the data impacts those categories and ask yourself if you’ve collected all the information necessary to draw a conclusion. If you are unsure, ask your team, “What am I missing?”

Interpretation: Based on the accumulated available information, clearly articulate, preferably in writing, both your decision and the reasoning behind how you reached it. You don’t know what you think until you see what you say.

Evaluation: Share your conclusion with leaders in the affected categories and let them ask you the hard questions. Does your conclusion hold up under their scrutiny?

Testing: Take your colleagues feedback and use it to iterate your conclusion. Test your theory on a sample before rolling it out to the whole.

What Could It Look Like?

Let’s say you are on your company’s marketing team and you are launching a new product in a competitive market. It’s not enough to come up with flashy slogans and eye-catching graphics. Team members must parse market data, research consumer trends, and study competitor strategies. You may have to question your client’s assumptions, challenge biases (both theirs and yours), and weigh alternative solutions in order to design a comprehensive marketing strategy. You have to ask questions. Who is the target audience? What other similar products already exist? Why would our target audience like ours better? When you gather enough data you can do a limited roll out in a test market.

Next week we’ll explore how you can use critical thinking to improve your job performance. In the meantime, what process do you use to think critically? Please share in the comments.

Under the Influence

Coworkers and managers influence your decisions. They have plans for you, but do their expectations align with your values, skills, and goals? Influence is a powerful tool that shapes your organization’s decisions, strategies, and culture. As a leader, it’s essential to intentionally decide whom you allow to influence you, but how?

Who You Are Looking For

Stay away from influencers who are negative, office politicians, cynical, and toxic. Look for people who ooze credibility, integrity, and reliability. Seek out people whose life experiences and ideas are different from yours. Surround yourself with individuals who encourage, inspire, and interact with everyone; not just those who can help them get ahead. You want to follow leaders who are committed to building a healthy and productive workplace environment. These may be colleagues with seniority, peers with specialized knowledge, or direct reports whose work ethic you admire.

What You Want From Them

You need influencers who will offer guidance, provide valuable insights, and exert a positive influence on your leadership style. These are not people who tell you what you want to hear. They both challenge and uplift you. They are accountability partners who spark your mutual growth. Align yourself with individuals who tell you the truth in love. You can identify them by the way they ask you questions then allow you space to rethink your opinions. These types of leaders are busy people. Relentlessly respect their time and find ways to bring value to the relationship.

Boundaries

It’s tricky to collaborate as a member of a team and complete your own assignments and avoid becoming a doormat. To maintain this delicate balance, you have to diplomatically manage both your supervisors’ and coworkers’ influence.

Set: Do you have time to complete your report and help your coworker prep for their client meeting? Be realistic about your own workload and deadlines. Does your team share calendars? Can they see when you are busy and vice versa? It is better to be unexpectedly available than to withdraw the help you said you’d give.

Communicate: As Brene Brown says, “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.” When you receive requests for help, first express your willingness to collaborate then email your manager and copy the requestor. Ask for clarity on whose project has priority in terms of what is best for the organization. If your manager decides your input is crucial to the project your teammate is working on, and that means you will miss a deadline on your own work, then ask what the new deadline for your own work is.

Protect: When prioritizing someone else’s project benefits you, your teammate, and your company, then it makes sense to move your boundary. But there is always that one person (let’s call them: TOP) who repeatedly asks for help until that task you do for them becomes part of your job description. Every time TOP asks for help, ask yourself: What is TOP’s track record for getting their own work done? Does what TOP wants me to do directly impact our organization’s bottom line? Will this project make me more visible to management and/or clients? Politely decline TOP’s invitation to do their work when the additional task conflicts with your current commitments or if it’s outside the scope of your responsibilities. It’s okay to offer guidance, share your expertise, and encourage problem-solving, but avoid taking on TOP’s tasks. For example, if TOP asks you for prospects, invite them to look at your LinkedIn contacts, filter for their target, and find people they want introductions to. If TOP persists, redirect them to your manager.

What criteria do you use to decide whom you allow to influence you? Please share in the comments.

How Do You Know?

A few weeks ago, we talked about how valuable it is to tolerate being bad at something long enough to get good at it. Since then, I’ve been asked a few questions. I’ll address three of them here.

The answer to all three is: It depends.

Q: How can you tell if you will eventually be good at a skill or if you will always be bad at it and are just wasting your time?

A: It depends on your attitude. For example, let’s say you are learning to program in Python. Are you so into it that you lose track of time while debugging your code? When you receive constructive feedback on your work, are you excited to try the suggested fixes? After studying the language for a month, do you feel good about how far you have come even if it is not very far? If you answered yes to these questions, then you have enough evidence to safely predict you will eventually be good at programming in Python.

Q: Doesn’t getting good at a skill just take hard work?

A: It depends on your mindset. Someone running on a treadmill and someone running on the street are both working hard, but the runner on the treadmill doesn’t go anywhere. Getting good at something depends more on how you learn rather than on how hard you work. Going back to the Python example, you can learn the language by putting in long hours every day, memorizing syntax, and struggling through coding exercises without seeking help or feedback. Using this approach you will hit plateaus and your progress will be slow because you are just repeating tasks without understanding them. Instead, if you focus on unlearning the outdated language you are currently writing in, understanding the underlying principles of Python, seeking guidance from experienced programmers, and participating in projects at work to apply what you are learning, then you will grasp concepts faster, troubleshoot more efficiently, and advance more quickly in mastering Python.

Q: Is it ever too late to acquire new skills?

A: It depends on your character. Are you naturally curious? If not, are you willing to grow that trait? Are you self-disciplined and resilient? Continuing the Python example, to be good at it you not only have to hone your technical skills you must also develop emotional intelligence, perseverance, and teamwork skills to use it at your job. Also, what motivates you? Do you set achievable short-term goals for yourself? Do you schedule time to learn Python on your calendar? Do you view difficulties as opportunities to learn? Determining if you will be good at Python, or any skill, requires self-awareness, feedback, and adaptability.

How do you stay motivated to be a life-long learner? Please share in the comments.