Break

Booked

Thinking about doing some reading while you wait for delayed flights or relatives to wake up from post-holiday-meal naps? Here are some books about T.E.A.M. that I thought were worth mine.

Time

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho – Translated from Portuguese, this hero’s journey is a brief, unapologetic fable. My biggest take away is: Omens are everywhere. When I think I’ve spotted one, I should stop and reflect on how it may direct my decision making.

The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green – Born from his podcast, the theme of these essays is the impact of people’s behavior on our current geological age. His topics include everything from “Humanity’s Temporal Range” to “Diet Dr Pepper.”

My Mrs. Brown by William Norwich – Another hero’s journey, this novel offers lovely prose, a depiction of women of a certain age, and characters we are surrounded by every day, but don’t consider their life stories. This is a great tale for goal-setters.

Energy

Designing Your Life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans – Tools, processes, and insight on how to get from where you are to where you want to be. The authors present systems you can implement to make decisions about your work, relationships, goals, etc., no matter what stage of life you’re in.

The Extended Mind by Annie Murphy Paul – Science-based research on why we need to get out of our heads when problem-solving. Presented in narrative form, it’s a validating read for knowledge workers.

High Conflict by Amanda Ripley – When we have a disagreement with someone, conflict becomes an additional adversary to battle. Engaging examples of people who believed the enemy of my enemy is my friend, identified conflict as the enemy, and worked together to defeat it.

Attention

The One Thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan – If you haven’t read many productivity books or you need a refresher on the basics of making wise choices, you’ll like this book. If you read Stephen Covey, Charles Duhigg, and/or James Clear, etc., then you will probably not be impressed. It’s short, so you could finish it on a cross-country flight.

Atlas of the Heart by Brené Brown – Read this before your holiday get-togethers and keep it handy for reference. It should be on your bookshelf right next to your dictionary and thesaurus. Brown identifies 87 emotions, why they affect relationships, and how you can navigate them to achieve connection.

The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker – This is the cure for meetings that should have been emails. Also, it will help you create more meaningful holiday gatherings.

Money

The Ultimate Retirement Guide for 50+ by Suze Orman – The author speaks plainly and with empathy. Preparing for retirement can be confusing and scary and this book helps you move forward with more confidence.

Never Too Old to Get Rich by Kerry E. Hannon – In 2021, the average age of successful startup founders was 45. If you think you are too old to start your own business, read this book and think again.

Know Your Value by Mika Brzezinski – The author chronicles her journey to get the appropriate recognition and compensation for her work. She also interviewed women in a variety of industries and reports their experiences too.

What are you reading? Please share in the comments.

P.S. I occasionally post on Saturdays what I’m reading that weekend. Please follow me on Facebook and and contribute to the conversation!

You First

Photo by Christian Domingues from Pexels

The constant running around during the holidays keeps you so filled with adrenaline that it’s easy to ignore how exhausted you are. Now that the holidays are officially over, you may feel under the weather. The very events that are supposed to be joyful often cause the most stress because of our (sometimes unrealistic) expectations. Add to that the uncertainty of the various variants of COVID plus the impending menace of cold and flu season and you have the ingredients for a tasty overthink stew. If your mind, body, and/or spirit are telling you to stop, then pay attention. Give yourself the gift of self-care.

Physical

Does stress have your neck tied up in knots? Get a massage. Do you feel jittery? Cut back on the caffeine. Do you feel sluggish? Cut back on the alcohol. Get up from your desk or couch and exercise. It doesn’t have to be strenuous. If it’s unseasonably warm, go for a walk. If it’s too cold outside to do that, then stretch or do some balance work. Be kind to your body by covering the basics: get eight hours of sleep, eat healthy foods, and drink plenty of water.

Mental

Not everyone’s holidays were happy. If you’re feeling more morose than merry, then try identifying your triggers. For example, does the thought of returning gifts in person at a big box store freak you out because of the close proximity of all the people and the possibilities of the presence of COVID? Then think about alternatives: go at a time when the store is least busy (Googling the store name will give you this data), wear a mask, and practice social distancing. Or, Is your mind overwhelmed by all the work others want your help with because they put projects on hold until after the holidays? Take a minute and ask yourself which of these projects require your unique expertise. Is there someone else you can delegate a project to? (Bonus points if that person is someone you sponsor.)

Spiritual

Routines can be calming. Beginning and ending your day the same way every day signals to your mind that everything is as it should be. Maybe you begin your day with prayer/meditation over coffee. Maybe you end it with box breathing as you lay in bed waiting for sleep. Practicing gratitude can be spiritual too. If you kept a gratitude journal for 2021, now is a good time to go back to the beginning and read it. If you didn’t, then to fill its pages for 2022, consider making it a priority to do one nice thing for one person everyday. It can be as simple as holding the door for someone behind you as you both enter the same building.

Resolve to pay attention to your mind, body, and spirit through regular self-care this year and do not feel guilty about it. If you want to pull out crayons and a Scooby Doo coloring book and spend an hour, then do it!

How do you practice self-care? Please share your tips in the comments.

Distracted December

The only thing I love more than making to-do lists is crossing items off them. But I feel something inside tugging on me to stop and pay attention to the holidays before they all pass by. If you feel the same, then here are some suggestions for reconciling work productivity and holiday celebrations.

Plan

What are the top three things you absolutely need to accomplish by January 1, 2022? Schedule them on your calendar and block that time. When you’re doing one of these tasks, concentrate on it until either it’s done, or you’ve gotten as far as you can in one sitting. Do not allow interruptions and distractions. Do not check your mobile or multi-task. Multi-tasking is like treading water. You work hard but don’t get very far. In this plan remember to schedule time for:

Checking with the people from whom you need information. Ask them when they are taking time off. This will prevent you from either interrupting their holidays or putting important projects on hold
Margin. If you think a task will take thirty minutes, schedule at least forty-five to complete it. If you’re done in forty minutes, take two of them and stare off into the distance to give your eyes a break before tackling the next project
Yourself. It’s the secret sauce of productivity. Even if it’s to spend the day in your PJs sipping coffee and reading a novel, take time to rest, recharge, and reboot
Buying gifts
Celebrating. Ask your co-workers what holidays they’re observing and invite them to share their traditions at the all-team party. BTW, leave your phone in another room so you aren’t tempted to check it
Attending a holiday networking event. The holiday season is a good opportunity to both make new acquaintances and deepen relationships with business associates you recently met
Adjusting the plan. In mid-December look at the bottom of your priority list and see what you can put off until after January 1st

Take care of yourself. Get up from your desk and stretch after an hour’s work. Drink a glass of water instead of a caffeinated drink. Get enough sleep. Reward yourself with a break to do whatever you want to for fifteen minutes (power nap, check Facebook, watch a cute cat video) after finishing a task.

Analyze

At the beginning of January, analyze your data. Answering these questions will help you improve the end of 2022:

Did you accomplish everything you wanted to? If not, what stopped you?
What did you do well?
What could you improve?
What do you wish you’d done differently? How will you make that adjustment next time?

You’re juggling parties, shopping, traveling, children’s events, etc., and you’d rather be watching Elf than working on the end-of-the-year report. Set your boundaries, communicate them, and enforce them. The earlier in the process you do this, the more understanding your team and manager will be.

Do you have a plan for finishing 2021 strong? Please share in the comments.

No Labor Today

Our wedding anniversary typically falls around Labor Day. My husband and I usually schedule time off work around the holiday weekend to celebrate by traveling a bit. This year marks our 30th wedding anniversary, so we decided to do something special. We visited Grand Teton National Park. We not only needed a grand gesture to celebrate our milestone, but also to get as far away from our day-to-day as possible. Pre-COVID-19, I wrote about how it benefits your job when you take a break from it. Mid-COVID-19, a break feels mandatory. With the blurred boundaries between work, home, school, etc., how can you process what you just lived through (and continue to live through) and use those learnings to iterate the next version of your life post-COVID-19? You don’t have to go all the way to Wyoming, but you should unplug, reset, and filter.

Unplug

We chose to get away to a place with little to no cell service, mostly because I can’t be trusted to enforce my OOO boundary. But maybe your children are in the throes of the beginning of both the school year and their fall extracurriculars so you need to stick close to home. Get creative about taking time to recharge. For example, take half-days off for a week. While the rest of your household is doing their things, turn off your phone, laptop, Xbox, etc., and change your scenery. If your job is sedentary, go to a Metropark and bike, walk, or kayak. If your job is physical, go to the library and read, journal, or listen to music. Whichever you choose, commit to only answering your mobile if there is a life (not work) emergency.

Reset

Get out of your comfort zone. Choose one activity you’ve never done before and do it every day for the week. If you work by yourself, follow CDC guidelines and do a project with others. If you work with others, find a solitary pursuit. You could:

Volunteer at your local food bank, church, or YWCA
Study coding with Python
Learn to cook your favorite restaurant meal with YouTube videos
Listen to different music (e.g., rap if you’re a country fan)
Read a different genre (e.g., non-fiction if you normally read sci-fi)

By the end of the week, you’ll know whether or not your choice is an activity you enjoy. If it helps you reset your mindset, then make time in your schedule to keep doing it.

Filter

At the end of each day, journal about your new activity. You could write, doodle, voice memo, whatever is your choice for making notes. Think about:

What did you see, hear, touch, taste, and/or smell?
How did it make you feel?
What did you learn?
What does it make you want to change?
What does it make you want to keep doing?
How will you use these new insights to influence your work?
Are there priorities you have to reset? People to whom you have to communicate boundaries? Comfort zones you have to get out of?

Prioritizing your physical, mental, and emotional health gives you the energy you need to bring your best effort to work, life, and people in your circle of influence.

What are you going to do to recharge? Please share in the comments.

Travel Team

It’s vacation season and if you have a spouse, you want to travel together. But there are things you want to do that they don’t, such as spend five hours at one art museum, spend three hours at a coffee shop, or spend an hour reading a book at a botanical garden. Luckily, you have friends who think these pastimes sound heavenly. In addition to traveling with your partner, take a trip with a friend. These adventures are ripe with lessons you can take back to work.

Getting to Know You

Constant togetherness reveals hidden talents as well as idiosyncrasies. For example, you discover that your friend has an uncanny ability to quickly spot your Uber while they notice that you can easily navigate large airports. On the other hand, maybe you are irritated by your friend’s obsession with the weather forecast and they are annoyed by your insistence to walk everywhere. We learn to be more considerate of each other because our time together is finite. The same is true at work. Projects have lifecycles. Acknowledge an interpersonal conflict when it starts. Be quick to define both your and your teammate’s boundary. Additionally, recognize that taking the time to unravel and resolve miscommunication is time well spent.

Plan B (or C or…)

When traveling, sometimes Plan A won’t work. Issues like flight delays, a car rental company losing your reservation, and a broken air conditioner in your hotel room provide multiple opportunities to not only find out how good a business is at customer service, but also work with your friend to figure out how to overcome the obstacle. Which one of you will: Take the lead in patiently communicating the unacceptable situation to customer service? Motivate the other to remain calm? Influence the service you receive by confirming that everyone is working toward the same goal? After recovering from the setback, you can take the lessons you learned (e.g., active listening, empathizing, aligning expectations) back to work and apply them to your team’s next project. When unpredictable obstacles occur, you can confidently take the lead to solve them because you’ve experienced the emotional intelligence required to get through a frustrating process.

Teamwork

The first time you travel with a friend to a destination that’s new to both of you, logic dictates that you set the parameters of the trip and start negotiating. Who is booking the transportation? Who is booking the hotel? Who is booking reservations at the restaurants, museums, sites, etc. that you want to visit? You divide up the task list according to talent. They are good at determining how much time you need between connecting flights. You can detect if a hotel is as good as its marketing says it is. You must trust each other to complete these tasks. During the trip, you both are gracious when unforeseen challenges happen. You patiently support one another when mistakes in judgement cause setbacks. You encourage each other to stretch outside of your comfort zones. You remain flexible so both of you can reach the individual objectives you have for the getaway. See what I did there? These activities are examples of collaborative teamwork. The same skills and mindset you use traveling with your friend apply to the project you’re tackling with your coworkers.

Do you plan to travel with friends this summer? Where are you going? Please share in the comments.

Another Christmas Story

Once upon a time, December was the busiest month of the year.

Holiday parties – my husband’s work, my work, our daughter’s school
Gifts – making a list (and checking it twice), buying, wrapping, personally delivering or shipping
Christmas cards – buying, writing the end-of-year-family newsletter, addressing, buying postage, mailing
Cooking – planning the menus, making a grocery list (also checking it twice) purchasing the ingredients, cooking, serving
Decorating – pulling decorations out of storage, repairing the damaged, purchasing new
Miscellaneous traditions – driving around to see Christmas lights, baking and delivering cookies for first responders, attending Christmas Eve service

My fingers are tired from typing this. At the time it was fun. We love putting on ugly Christmas sweaters, gathering with friends and family and coworkers and celebrating the season, right? Or do we just love the idea of it? We downplay the stress of its reality. Our brains exhausted from holiday office party small talk. Our savings account spent on gifts for neighbors we barely know. Our cupboards bare from constantly replenishing the buffet at our extended family’s feast. Our vision of the perfect holiday is rarely realized since we can’t control the players, and this holiday season, there isn’t much of anything we can control.

During our first holiday season in Georgia, my husband was a worship leader, our daughter was in elementary school, and I was a teacher’s aide. By the morning of Christmas Eve, all three of us were exhausted from, well, see the list above. Working multiple Christmas Eve services, my husband was unavailable from early morning until late evening. Our daughter and I attended the first service. We grabbed tins of cookies the congregation baked for first responders on our way out. In the car, we ordered pizza before leaving the parking lot. By the time we dropped off the cookies at the firehouse located between the church and the restaurant, our pizza was waiting for us at the drive-thru. We got home and put on our jammies (it was only about 1:00PM, btw). I found White Christmas on TV. We ate pizza. We sang “Happy Birthday” to Jesus, blew out the candles on His cake, and ate slices for Him. We napped. When my husband got home, we repeated the process. We watched Christmas movies, stuffed our faces, and napped for the next 24 hours. Christmas Day ended with a drive through a local coffee shop for lattes and hot chocolate and meandering through neighboring subdivisions to look at their Christmas lights on the way back home. We did not answer the phone or check social media the entire time. It was the most relaxed the three of us had been since Thanksgiving. When the next year rolled around our daughter asked if we could do it again. I dubbed it “cocooning” and it became a tradition for the rest of our Georgia residency.

Several of our holiday activities aged out. I no longer send a year-end family newsletter. I refer everyone to social media. Email makes sending season’s greetings both quick and inexpensive. Because of COVID-19, more traditions are canceled this year and if I’m honest, I’m sorry, not sorry. We have plenty of options to cocoon. We can:

have food delivered either from our grocery to make our favorite treats, or from a local restaurant. If we order through a food delivery service, we keep a local driver employed
stream most any Christmas movie ever made
have decorations and jammies delivered from a local department store
stream holiday music playlists from our chosen service
send a cookie gift basket to our nearest firehouse through a local bakery
watch our church’s Christmas Eve service on their website
make our own lattes and hot chocolate and tour neighborhood Christmas light displays from our couch thanks to YouTube (For my Dayton, Ohio friends, you can see the old Rike’s holiday windows virtually)

This global crisis has given us a holiday gift: a reason to celebrate small. Do you usually:

travel 312 miles to stay with the in-laws? Can’t this year; COVID
spend hundreds of dollars on gifts? Can’t this year; COVID
attend your partner’s office holiday party? Can’t this year; COVID.

The pandemic has taken people we love, employment we need, and freedoms we cherish away from us. But, it has given us a reason to stop, be grateful for what we still have, and act on it. Let’s celebrate through our words and (maybe virtual) presence the people we’ve leaned on, both personally and professionally, to get through 2020. Isn’t that the essence of the holidays? Making sure people know how much we appreciate them?

How are you adjusting your holiday celebrations this year? Please share in the comments.

Can You Feel the Heat?

This COVID Christmas feels off just enough to make us lose our balance. For example, our daughter called me during her commute home the other night. She was stressed. She’d spent eight mask-wearing-social-distancing hours at her office and was rushing home in Chicago traffic to set up the work station in her apartment. She was scheduled to guest on a college’s webcast to promote her company to their student listeners. As I tried to extinguish the fire of her burnout over the phone from 316 miles away and five minutes before Jeopardy!, she accused me of speaking in lyrics from Hamilton, an American Musical. Can you blame me? It has several relatable scenes of characters striving for work-life balance; “Non-Stop” being the most obvious.

The focus of the song “Non-Stop” is Alexander Hamilton writing The Federalist Papers, but he’s got a lot going on in addition. He’s practicing law. He’s a delegate to the Constitutional Convention. He’s distracted by Angelica Schuyler’s move to London and impending marriage. His wife, Eliza, pressures him to accompany her and their children on a summer vacation to her dad’s place, and George Washington enlists him to lead the Treasury Department. Alexander was both working from home and homing from work. Sound familiar?

Maybe you don’t practice law, but you do own a business
You aren’t a delegate to the Constitutional Convention, but maybe you are a board chair
Maybe you aren’t distracted by a friend moving across the ocean, but you are preoccupied by your child’s intent to move into his college’s student housing
Maybe you aren’t being pressured by your wife to accompany her and your children to the in-law’s place for a holiday, but, wait; maybe you are
Maybe you haven’t been approached to lead the Treasury Department, but you are concerned about leading your sales department through the rest of Q4

Add the holiday season to any one of the above scenarios and you’re on the road to burnout. So what can you do? Tap the brakes.

Ways to Combat Holiday Burnout

Take a day (or even just half a day) of vacation and get your hair done; particularly if you get a paid holiday off this month. The extra time spent on your appearance will make you feel better
Phone a friend. We’re all feeling a little mental right now. Find out how he is coping. Stay connected to people; especially the ones you care about and who care about you
Find your release. Take a walk outside. Listen to a true-crime podcast. Take a power nap. Snuggle your pet. Browse memes. Whatever it is, take fifteen minutes to decompress
Change your scenery. If you’re working from home, don’t conference call in the same room every time
Do something holiday themed. Wrap a Hanukkah gift. Bake Christmas cookies. Plan the Karamu menu. Switch to egg nog instead of coffee

I can’t believe I just suggested a drink other than coffee.

What are you doing to battle holiday burnout? Please share your tips and tricks in the comments section.

Tick Tock Your Life is a Clock

You don’t have to make sweeping changes to the way you work to be more productive. COVID-19 has already brought sweeping changes to the way you work. Whether you are back in the office or still remote, little tweaks to your processes can have big results by the end of the week.

Concentrate

Multitasking is a myth. Even if you only spend five minutes concentrating on one task, you’ll get it done faster. You can’t prevent interruptions, but you can minimize distractions like silencing your phone and putting it out of reach so you can’t hear the social media notifications going off. Be proactive and don’t instantly react. Let the phone call go to voicemail. Let the email that just arrived sit in the inbox. Refuse the ad hoc meeting. Turn off instant message. Mute the computer. Are you a procrastinator? If your manager does not do regular accountability meetings, assign yourself project deadlines and write up your own weekly status reports. Take the last half hour of the day to determine what can be put off until tomorrow. The list should be both specific and realistic. For example: achieving inbox zero is not an acceptable task. Return Boss’s email regarding corporate holiday gifts, is. Calendar tasks that are important, but not urgent for times in your day you can count on having a quiet space in which to work.

Control

Most of us are really bad at estimating the passage of time. Keep track of how much you actually spend on tasks, including checking social media. An app may help. If the task is something you can do in less than five minutes, do it. Is there a task you’ve been dreading? Do it first and get it over with. When you receive a meeting request, ask yourself if your presence is necessary. Can you request an email summary or delegate someone else to attend? Speaking of email, most of it is someone adding a task to our list. Check your inbox at regular intervals. (Because you’ve muted the notification, right?) As soon as you log on, reply to every message that takes no more than two minutes to answer. If the message takes longer, write a rough draft, but don’t send it. A couple of hours later, refine it, and send it if you’re satisfied, then, repeat the process with the emails that arrived during that time. Schedule tasks according to when you feel most alert. Do deep work when you have the most brain power and routine tasks when you have the least.Take a break. Get up and stretch, walk around the block, or check social media. Change your scenery. Going outside or even just to a different room can boost your productivity.

You will get distracted and you will get mad at yourself for it. Forgive yourself and move on. Don’t overthink. Complete is greater than perfect. Do it. Leave it. Return to it. When all you’re changing are nitpicky details, submit it.

What are your productivity tips? Please share them in the comments section.