Mardi Humphreys

The Priority

Meetings pile up, emails flood in, and by the end of the workday, you’ve spent more time reacting than making intentional choices. What if managing your time Isn’t just about productivity? What if it’s an act of self-respect?

The Reasoning

Value: When you prioritize your schedule, you send a message that your time is valuable and should be used purposefully. Research from ScienceDirect.com shows that people who set clear boundaries around their time experience greater job satisfaction and overall well-being.

Self-Care: Just like you care for your physical health by eating well and exercising, managing your time is a form of self-care. A study published in the Journal of Occupational Health Psychology found that employees who have control over their schedules experience lower stress levels and higher engagement.

Benefits

Better Mental Health: When you take control of your schedule, you reduce feelings of being overwhelmed. A report by the American Psychological Association found that time-related stress contributes significantly to burnout. By allocating time for work, rest, and personal activities, you maintain a healthier mental state.

Increased Job Satisfaction: Prioritizing tasks that align with your goals and values makes your work more meaningful. Research from Happy Companies indicates that employees who spend more time on meaningful tasks report higher job satisfaction and are more likely to stay engaged in their roles.

Stronger Sense of Self-Worth: Making deliberate choices about how you spend your time shows you believe your goals and well-being are important. This leads to greater confidence and resilience at work.

Prioritize

Review: At the beginning of each workday, take a few minutes to review and prioritize your tasks. Identify the top three most important things you want to get done and work on those first, preferably uninterrupted.

Technology: Use apps like digital calendars, task management tools, and reminders to keep track of your schedule and commitments. Tools like Asana, Trello, or even a spreadsheet can help you stay organized and focused.

Boundaries: Through status messages or direct conversations, communicate your availability to your coworkers and managers. Let them know the best times to reach you and when you need uninterrupted time to focus.

Rest: Schedule short breaks throughout your day to recharge. This not only boosts productivity but also respects your need for downtime. You may find The Pomodoro Technique useful. It suggests 25 minutes of work followed by a 5-minute break.

Calls to Action

Delegate: Thinking you have to do everything yourself is a trap. A study by the American Management Association found organizations who delegate well have a 30% increase in productivity. Learn to trust colleagues and delegate tasks that don’t require your direct involvement.

Say No: It’s hard to say no to projects you find attractive, but pause and assess whether a request aligns with your goals before committing. A 2024 study from Mental Health America found that professionals who confidently say no experience lower stress levels and higher job performance.

Manage Decision Fatigue: Decision fatigue is real, and it drains your mental energy. A study published in PNAS found that judges make less favorable rulings later in the day due to decision fatigue. The same thing applies to you. Automate minor decisions, like meal planning or outfit choices, to free up mental space for more important work-related decisions.

What’s one small change you can make today to respect your time? Please share in the comments.

The Bargain

A company you like has an open position you want. You had a discovery conversation with the hiring manager and you submitted your resume and cover letter. (It’s 2025, why are cover letters still a thing?! Please comment if you know.) It’s time to interview. They will tell you what they want from the new hire and you will tell them the conditions under which you’re willing to work. How can you make this negotiation productive for both you and your potential employer?

Reality Check

Let’s use the Tech Industry as an example. In terms of employment, it’s been volatile since the pandemic. Tons of people were hired in 2020, then big companies started letting tons of employees go in 2022 and those layoffs are still happening. Under these conditions, negotiating your compensation may feel intimidating. With companies regaining leverage, you need to enter the interview knowing what the state of the industry is and how that impacts the benefits you want. Here is an article that tells you how to research a company’s financial stability.

Research

Look up the market rates for similar roles in your location on PayScale, Salary.com, or Glassdoor. Define three numbers: The minimum salary you will accept, the ideal salary you’d be thrilled to get, and your walkaway number. Factor in personal costs. For example, what is your cost of living? What career growth opportunities will the employer offer? What are your work-life balance needs?

Salary

Most companies have a budget for each position, but they may not volunteer this information. It’s important to find out what they are willing to pay before you reveal any of your three numbers. When the hiring manager asks you how much money you want, try this response: “I’m open, but I’d love to understand the salary range you have in mind for this role.” This prevents you from lowballing yourself and gives you a baseline for negotiation. Once you know the range, push for the top. If they offer $90K–$110K, make a case for why you deserve $110K. Give illustrations of your experience, projects, and results. For example: for a Software Developer: “In my last role, I improved system performance by 30%, reducing downtime and saving the company an estimated $200K annually.”

Benefits

Compensation is more than a paycheck and benefits can make a huge difference in how attractive the job is. You also have to acknowledge that there will be tradeoffs. For example, if you push for a higher salary, then they may push for you to be in the office full-time. Consider negotiating for remote/hybrid work options, additional PTO, an upskilling budget, and/or equity or bonuses.

Mindset

Approach negotiation as a two-way conversation, not a battle. Filling this role is a challenge for the hiring manager. Act like the problem-solver you are by using “we” language. For example, “We want to ensure this is a strong long-term fit. Can we adjust the offer to reflect that?” By framing your requests as suggestions you signal your intent to help them achieve the result they want.

What other strategies do you use when negotiating compensation? Please share in the comments

Even Keeled

Last week we talked about how to become aware of our emotions, what triggers them, and how they affect our decision making. Now that you know what they are and why they happen, let’s talk about moving from self-awareness to self-regulation.

You Are in Charge

When you start to feel out of control, what can you do to get ahead of your emotions and constructively respond?

Pause – For example, you are tasked with removing the bottleneck from one of your organization’s workflows. You email the project manager an idea. The reply you receive is harshly critical and dismissive. What do you do? You want to fire off a defensive response. Instead, take a breath, step away, and revisit the email later. The pause gives your rational mind a chance to kick in.

Reset – When stress builds, your decision-making suffers. Techniques like deep breathing or a quick meditation can help in the moment. On days you have to make important decisions, take a break to move your body in addition to those tools. Even a short walk around the block can make a difference. Give yourself a 15-minute “reset break” to clear your mind.

Adapt – Asynchronous work environments demand flexibility. For example, a teammate’s delayed reply may derail your plan. When it does, remind yourself that staying open to new solutions helps maintain momentum in the long run.

Get Social

Strong relationships pave the way for problem-solving as well as career advancement. Building those relationships takes deliberate effort.

Communicate – For example, you’re on a video call with your team putting together an agenda for a client update and they are all distracted. Instead of letting your annoyance show, try saying, “I’d love everyone’s input on this. What else do we want the client to know that I don’t have on this list?” Inviting engagement respectfully can shift the tone of the meeting.

Share – Teams thrive when credit is shared. If you’re leading a project, make it a habit to highlight contributions from teammates, even in small ways like Slack shout-outs.

Learn – Disagreements happen. It’s how you handle them that matters. Focus on solutions instead of assigning blame. For example, if someone misses a deadline, instead of saying, “You messed up,” try, “Let’s figure out how to avoid this in the future.”

Support – If you notice a team member struggling with a task, offer to be a resource. A small gesture, like volunteering to review their work, shows commitment to the team’s success.

Galvanize – Even when projects get messy, a positive outlook can help your team keep going. For example, if a new tool isn’t working as expected, reframing the setback as a learning opportunity can keep morale from plummeting.

Practice – Start with one small action each day. For example, pause before replying to an irritating email or ask a colleague how they’re feeling before diving into work. Over time, these habits become second nature.

Next Steps

Remember the emotion log you kept last week? Pull it out. Knowing what you know now, how do you wish you would have responded in those situations? Now you have an option to experiment with the next time those triggers go off. Here are a few ideas to maintain your progress.

Reflect – Spend five minutes at the end of each workday reviewing your emotional responses and interactions. If there is something you wish you’d done differently, make a note of it. If you responded instead of reacted to a trigger, pat yourself on the back.

Experiment – Try one self-regulation technique during a challenging moment. For example, box breathe, or silently count to three before speaking. Find what works best for maintaining your composure.

Ask – Request feedback from a trusted colleague on how you handle stress during collaboration. This is a private conversation maybe over coffee.

How do you self-regulate to function better at work? Please share in the comments.

Control Yourself

Self-awareness is critical to your success at work, but it’s only the beginning. You must move beyond self-awareness to self-regulation so you can develop stronger relationships and make better decisions under pressure. Being self-aware means you understand what emotions you’re experiencing and why in the moment. In this first article of a two-parter, let’s think about how to recognize your emotions, what triggers them, and how they affect your decision making.

Recognize Your Emotions

Do you feel your patience evaporate when someone schedules yet another meeting at 4:30 p.m.? Or maybe your stress spikes when you’re asked to present in front of leadership. These reactions are normal, but not recognizing them means you’ll likely let them dictate your behavior over and over again. Try keeping an emotion log for a week. After intense reactions, jot down what you felt, what triggered it, and how you responded. Your goal is data capture. At this point, you aren’t trying to change anything. You’re seeking clarity.

Listen to Your Body

Your body often signals your emotions before your mind processes them. For example, clenched fists may signal frustration, or a tight feeling in your chest can indicate anxiety. When your heart races during a tense one-on-one with your manager, this is a physical cue. Remind yourself to pause, breathe, and do not respond impulsively. If your shoulders tense every time a particular coworker emails you, then take a moment to analyze why. Are you anticipating conflict? Understanding this pattern can help you approach your reply calmly.

Understand Your Triggers

How do you feel when your coworker interrupts you during brainstorming sessions? What about when a teammate takes credit for your work during a presentation? Does your head hurt when your manager abruptly shifts deadlines or priorities without explanation? Does receiving vague feedback on a high-stakes project haunt you for days? If you recognize the patterns in your behavior, then you can prevent your frustration from making bad decisions for you during critical interactions. Knowing your triggers lets you plan responses instead of reactions.

Get Perspective

Feedback from colleagues can uncover blind spots. You expect to get feedback from your manager, but you probably won’t get it from your teammates unless you ask. For example, if your tech lead thinks you seem dismissive when you disagree with them, that is something you want to know. You need to become aware of how your unintentional reactions affect those around you. Once you are, you can adjust your tone and body language during your conversations. If you don’t have a work bestie you trust to tell you the truth, you can use personality assessments like StrengthsFinder or Enneagram to discover your natural tendencies.

Reflect on Your Reactions

Look back at that emotion log you kept for a week. The data you collected states what you felt, the trigger, and how you responded. Now, ask yourself why you responded that way in those situations. For example, if you felt anxiety during a meeting, the trigger was a shortened deadline, and your response was raising your voice, ask yourself: “Why did I respond that way?” Maybe the answer is tight deadlines bring out your impatience. Since tight deadlines are going to keep happening, think about how you can handle similar situations more constructively. Over time identifying your patterns will not only help you identify similar emotions in real time, but also help you control them. Keep your emotion log this week and next week we’ll talk about some constructive ways to regulate them.

What emotion do you feel most while at work? Please share in the comments.

Natural Intelligence

For 2025 our conversations will focus on Power Skills (the skills formerly known as “Soft”). Why? To future proof our jobs. As Artificial Intelligence (AI) reshapes the planet, we face a unique challenge: Staying relevant in a workplace where technology automates repetitive tasks. AI excels at technical, hard skills tasks like data analysis, coding, and project tracking. Eventually quantum computing will do hard skills jobs at enterprise-level scale. But AI can’t yet replicate humanity like our ability to adapt, connect, and relate. Power skills like flexibility, empathy, and communication, aren’t just nice to have anymore. They’re essential tools you need for surviving in the future of work.

Finding the Gaps

AI creates opportunities to offload repetitive tasks, freeing you up to focus on solving complex problems, working with others, and making decisions that require emotional intelligence. Power skills fill the gap where technology ends. What does that look like? Here are some examples:

Time management: AI can organize your schedule, but it can’t prioritize tasks based on your unique team dynamics.
Productivity: Automation tools can handle routine updates, but they can’t motivate a team to overcome roadblocks.
Decision-making: Algorithms can analyze data, but interpreting how it impacts people often requires human judgment.

Filling the Gaps

In what areas can you grow where AI struggles? Empathy, adaptability, and effective communication are hard to automate because they require context, emotional nuance, and creative problem-solving. Let’s say you’re a project manager leading a team during a major transition. AI can help forecast timelines and budgets, but it can’t address your team’s concerns about job security or coach them through adapting to new tools. That’s where your emotional intelligence and leadership come in, ensuring the transition is productive and supportive.

Foiling the Gaps

Upskill: Platforms like LinkedIn Learning offer courses on communication, leadership, and conflict resolution. Start with a course that aligns with your current challenges.
Practice: Actively listen to colleagues by summarizing their concerns before responding. This shows you’re not just hearing but also understanding them. For example, during a team meeting, you realize you dominate discussions. You adjust your approach to create space for quieter teammates to contribute, leading to better outcomes. This self-awareness and empathy are skills AI does not have.
Adapt: Volunteer for cross-functional projects or tasks outside your comfort zone. It’s a great way to build resilience and learn to pivot under pressure. For example, your company adopts a new AI-based tool. Instead of resisting, you learn its features and become the go-to resource for your team, showcasing your value.
Lead: Launch small initiatives for your team, like organizing brainstorming sessions or mentoring a colleague. For example, you take the lead on a high-visibility project. You rally the team with clear goals and encouragement making everyone feel invested in the outcome.
Evaluate: Use your 1:1 meetings with your manager to request honest feedback about your communication, adaptability, or leadership. Ask for specific examples and tips for improvement.

The workplace is evolving fast, but your ability to flex, empathize, and communicate will keep you in demand. The future of work is about using AI as a tool so you can do what it can’t. Be human.

What power skill did I forget? Please share in the comments.

Money Missteps

Your money is more than numbers in a banking app. It’s deeply tied to your emotions, habits, and decisions. Missteps like overspending, ignoring debt, or failing to prepare for the unexpected, can quietly sabotage your financial goals. Let’s explore common money mistakes, why they are dangerous, and how to fix them, so you can take control of your future.

Impulse Spending

You’ve had a long day packed with back-to-back meetings. So, you have dinner delivered. The next day, you grab an expensive coffee. The next day you splurge on a new gadget that promises to boost your productivity. Those small decisions over the course of three days added up quickly.

Why It’s Dangerous

These habits often develop as coping mechanisms and they create a false sense of comfort while draining your resources. Work stress depletes your decision-making capacity, and impulsive purchases feel like a quick fix.

How To Fix It

Pause: Before buying ask yourself, “Do I really need this?”

Parameters: Allocate a weekly budget for discretionary spending and stick to it. Track your spending to identify unnecessary expenses and cut them.

Plan: Prepping meals and bringing your own coffee to work avoids costly, last-minute decisions and helps reduce the temptation to overspend.

Convenience

It’s easy to rely on credit cards or personal loans for emergencies and make repayment a challenge for future you.

Why It’s Dangerous

Debt often feels like an immediate solution, but it can snowball into a long-term burden.

How To Fix It

Recognize: If your borrowing is fueled by emotion (e.g., you feel shamed because your phone is three years old and your coworkers’ phones are brand new) before purchasing, write a 250-word reflection on why you feel you need it.

Research: If the purchase is essential and it’s for work, check your benefits plan. Many enterprise workplaces offer employee discounts on essential purchases.

Repay: Set aside a portion of your income to pay down debt even if it means tightening your budget temporarily. Pay off credit cards and loans with the highest rates first.

Emergencies

A car repair, medical bill, or sudden job loss can derail even the best-laid plans if you don’t have a financial safety net.

Why It’s Dangerous

Building savings often feels like a luxury when you have competing demands like rent or student loans. But without an emergency fund, you’re forced to rely on credit or loans, setting back your financial progress.

How To Fix It

Activate: Begin with a goal of saving $1,500 for emergencies, then gradually build up to three to six months’ worth of expenses.

Automate: Direct deposit a percentage of each paycheck into a separate savings account. Even $20 per week adds up over time.

Analyze: Where can you cut back without feeling deprived? Redirect funds from unused subscriptions or discretionary spending toward your emergency fund.

Action Steps

Audit: Take an objective look at where your money is going and identify areas for improvement.

Boundaries: Define clear limits for discretionary spending and stick to them.

Identify: Choose one habit, like over-relying on takeout or not saving for emergencies, that you want to change.

Commit: Make one change for the next week, like packing lunch twice or setting up automatic savings.

Evaluate: At the end of the week, see what worked and what needs adjustment.

Improving your financial habits starts with small, deliberate steps that align your spending and saving with your values and long-term goals. If you manage your emotions and make thoughtful decisions, then you can build a stronger financial future starting today.

What habit have you addressed to protect your financial future? Please share in the comments.

Hurray for Quitter’s Day!

Are you getting ready to celebrate Quitter’s Day this Friday? Every year Quitter’s Day is the second Friday in January. Never heard of it? It’s the day 80% of Americans give up on their New Year’s resolutions. Why do I love Quitter’s Day so much?

Unresolved

Because I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions. You don’t have to wait until January 1 to make positive changes in your life. When the pain of staying the same is too much, then please do something about it no matter what time of year it is. It doesn’t have to be a big change. In fact, Quitter’s Day is evidence that making big changes doesn’t work very well for a lot of us. Instead think about iterating your processes.

What’s to Love?

I was asked about my liberal use of the word iterate. I love the word so much because it is a shortcut. It is one word that encapsulates the entire process of continuous improvement. Let’s think about how you can apply iteration to your processes at work so you can make that work more painless.

It’s Science

Iteration is based on the scientific method which is a valuable tool for critical thinking. It helps you be more objective and find the real change you need to make instead of just focusing on the symptoms of the problem. For example, let’s say you are on a team of five people. You are the designated manager of a project. You are past the define and design phases and are stuck between the build and test phases. If you don’t do something, you’ll not reach the release phase by the deadline. Use the scientific method to get unstuck.

In Action

Observe: Analyze the current workflow. Identify the gaps.
Ask: Formulate questions about what you observed. What is happening? Where is the bottleneck? Why are you not getting the result you expect?
Hypothesize: What are the possible explanations for what you observed? Define the variables. For example, does the team member who is building the solution keep getting interrupted?
Design: Come up with an experiment that changes one of the variables. (Like, blocking an hour of the builder’s time and sending them off-site to concentrate uninterrupted.) Note the improvement you expect to get by changing the variable.
Test: Conduct your experiments for each variable to test your hypothesis. Collect the data. For example, did your builder make significant progress?
Evaluate: Use the data gathered from your experiments to draw conclusions. Did the change get you the outcome you wanted? Is it an improvement? Do you want to implement the change to the process? If not, do you need to conduct the experiment again but on a different variable?
Share: Iteration is a cycle. The cycle hinges on feedback. With each iteration, define your “Why”. In other words, what are you trying to accomplish?

Full Disclosure

The iteration process is additional work. But the more you use it, the better you get at it and the faster you move through it saving you time, energy, attention, and money in the long run. When you make good decisions up front, you have fewer messes to clean up on the back end.

How do you use the scientific method to iterate your work processes? Please share in the comments.

That’s a Wrap

Thank you for spending 2024 with me! As we begin a new year together, here are our top three conversations in each category: Time, Energy, Attention, and Money (T.E.A.M.), based on LinkedIn impressions. The first article in each category received the most impressions.

Time

Time Keeps on Ticking

All the Feels

Enquiring Minds

Energy

Underwhelmed

That is Disappointing

Serve or Protect?

Attention

Focus on the Future

Civil Service

Sustainable Success

Money

More Civil Service

High Pay Can Cost You

Working 5 to 9

What decisions around time, energy, attention, and money are you facing in the new year? Please share in the comments.

Get in Align

The end of the year is a good time to reflect. Don’t know where to start? You can modify the agile retrospective used in project management and use it to both look back on what you accomplished this year and look forward to what you want to accomplish next year.

Start with Four Basic Prompts:

What went well?

Acknowledge wins, big or small. Maybe you mastered a new tool, streamlined your workflow, or received positive feedback from a client. Recognizing these moments builds confidence and clarifies what you should keep doing.

What didn’t?

Reflect on challenges. Did you struggle to meet deadlines or communicate effectively with a coworker? Identify pain points without self-judgment.

What do I need to improve?

Be specific. If you found time management difficult, pinpoint the cause. Was it procrastination, overcommitment, or distractions?

What are some ideas for achieving that improvement?

Brainstorm solutions. If you aim to improve your productivity, think about turning notifications off on all your devices.

Need a template?

Here is an example to help you get started. Let’s say you struggled with time management this year. Your reflection might look like this:

What went well? You met your quarterly goals for client deliverables.

What didn’t go well? You felt constantly rushed and missed a few deadlines.

What do I need to improve? Prioritizing tasks better.

Ideas for improvement: Use a time-blocking app to organize your day, plan weekly reviews, and delegate admin tasks to focus on high-value work.

But Wait, There’s More

Now that you have a framework, here are some additional prompts to help you reflect more deeply.

What tasks energized me this year? What drained me?

If presenting at meetings invigorates you, but repetitive admin work wears you down, consider delegating low-impact tasks or automating processes to free up energy for high-value activities.

What can I let go of?

Free yourself from habits or projects that no longer serve you. Maybe it’s saying no to tasks outside your organization’s mission or stepping away from a committee that’s not aligned with your goals.

What skills do I want to develop next year?

If you’re aiming for a leadership role, focus on skills like strategic thinking or team-building.

Where did I spend most of my time? Was it aligned with my goals?

If a significant portion of your time went to handling urgent but unimportant tasks, consider revisiting your prioritization methods. For suggestions on tools, Google “time management techniques.”

What feedback did I receive this year? Did I act on it?

If you received repeated comments about your unclear communication, then use them to set improvement goals.

What decisions or actions had the most impact? What can I learn from them?

Reflect on high-impact decisions, whether positive or negative. Did you successfully manage a challenging project? Or did you miss an opportunity because you hesitated? Identify patterns in your decision-making process. It will sharpen your capability to continuously improve.

What prompts do you use to gain insight on your professional development? Please share in the comments.

Presents or Presence?

I checked my data to see what I spent on the holidays last year. I have lists going back to 2020. Do you do that too? No? Just me? Okay. Anyway, I checked my data because I’m looking for ways to save money and I’m struggling. I want to be generous and I need to pay the electric bill. You too? Then let’s talk about some ways we can keep the holiday spirit without going into debt.

In a survey of Americans November 6 – 20, 2024, Gallup found we plan to spend $1012 just on holiday gifts (including gifts for coworkers) this year. If that number makes your wallet sweat, you’re not alone. With inflation still pinching budgets and financial stability on everyone’s mind, it’s time to rethink holiday spending; especially at work. You don’t have to be a Scrooge, but you do have to be intentional. There are plenty of ways to show both kindness and appreciation without spending a lot of money.

Research

Think back to last year. Did you give gifts to every member of your team, your department, and your remote colleagues? If so, consider whether that was necessary or if there’s a more meaningful (and affordable) way to celebrate this year. For example, Let’s say you work on a team of six people. Last year, you gave each coworker a $20 gift card. This year, suggest an alternative like a low-cost team activity; maybe an in-person potluck lunch or a virtual happy hour where everyone can participate without financial strain.

Redirect

If the majority of your coworkers insist on a gift exchange and it’s not in your budget to participate, declining can feel awkward. But you can do it gracefully. For example, your department organizes a Secret Santa. If you need to opt out, be direct but polite. You can say, “Thanks for including me! I’m trying to stick to a strict budget this year, so I’ll sit this one out. Have fun!” If appropriate, you can suggest an activity like coordinating a cookie swap during the gift exchange. This shows you’re still invested in the celebration and offers others who feel the same way you do a way to opt out too.

Redesign

Celebrations don’t always have to involve gifts. Instead, focus on experiences or gestures that build connection. For example, let’s say you’re part of a large department where individual gift-giving isn’t feasible. You could organize a group coffee outing where everyone covers their own drink.

Refuse

Once you’ve set a budget, stick to it. Don’t feel the need to justify smaller gifts or creative alternatives. Rehearse polite ways to decline gift exchanges if necessary. The holidays should be about connection, not financial regret. Most people value the thought behind a gift more than its monetary value. For example, you can give a heartfelt card or handwritten note expressing specific appreciation for each person’s contributions. Thoughtful words of affirmation leave a positive lasting impression far beyond the holidays while costing little money.

How do you handle holiday gifting at work? Please share in the comments.