Examine the Evidence

For Q1, we reflected on patterns in how we work. For Q2, we reflected on our direction, ambition, setbacks, and emotional intelligence. For Q3, let’s think about what the last nine months taught us and what we’re going to do about it. 

Let’s not make the Q3 reflection another exercise in asking whether you accomplished everything you planned. You have enough performance reviews in your life. You also have had enough time to stop calling everything an experiment. Some things worked. Some didn’t. Some goals still matter. Some sounded better in January. Some commitments continue to occupy your calendar mostly because you haven’t made a decision about them yet. And that last category deserves your time and brain power. 

Ask yourself: What has earned the right to come with me into Q4?

Nine months gave you evidence. Q4 is where you use it. This is discernment: the ability to look at what you’ve learned, decide what matters now, and make choices accordingly. It’s also leadership. Leadership is both deciding what gets your yes and what gets a no, a not anymore, a not like this, or a not right now.

Your Q3 Decision Audit

How about instead of answering 20 reflection questions you  make four decisions: Finish. Stop. Renegotiate. Carry Forward? Grab a piece of paper or open a blank document. Make four columns. Then start sorting.

FINISH: What Deserves One Last Push?

Not every unfinished project is a failure. Some things simply need more time. Look at the goals, conversations, and commitments you started this year. Which ones still matter enough to complete now? Maybe you committed to earning a certification and you’re two courses away. Maybe you promised yourself you would update your portfolio. Maybe there’s an important conversation you keep postponing because having it will be uncomfortable.

Ask yourself: If I finish only three important things before the end of the year, what deserves to be one of them?

STOP: What Are You Continuing Without a Good Reason?

This one may sting a little. Look for things that have outlived their usefulness: A goal you no longer want. A habit you keep defending even though it isn’t helping you. A committee, obligation, routine, or relationship you continue because stopping feels awkward. Sometimes we mistake consistency for commitment. Consistency says, “I’ve been doing this.” Commitment says, “This still matters.” 

Ask yourself: What am I continuing mostly because I already started?

Your previous investment does not automatically deserve your future time. Stopping something can be a leadership decision, especially when continuing it would consume resources better used somewhere else. I know, I know. It’s REALLY hard to walk away from that sunk cost. When I have to do it, I tell myself it’s the tuition I pay for the learning. (Try it and let me know if it helps.)

RENEGOTIATE: What Still Matters, But Can’t Continue Like This?

Some problems require quitting. Some don’t. Sometimes the goal is right and the arrangement is wrong. Maybe you want to keep volunteering, but not every weekend. Maybe you value a professional relationship, but you need clearer boundaries. Maybe you still want the promotion, but the strategy you’ve been using to pursue it isn’t working. Maybe an important project belongs on your plate, but three other projects need to come off first.

Ask yourself: What do I still want, but under different conditions?

This is where your decision-making gets more sophisticated. We tend to think our options are yes or no, stay or leave, continue or quit. Good leaders look for the third option. Change the scope. Move the deadline. Ask for help. Clarify expectations. Reduce the frequency. Have the conversation. Renegotiation allows you to protect what matters without pretending the current arrangement is sustainable.

CARRY FORWARD: What’s Working?

Reflection has an annoying tendency to become a hunt for everything that needs fixing. Please don’t do that to yourself. Q3 also produced evidence about what works. Maybe you got better at pausing before responding. Maybe you protected your mornings. Maybe you became more direct. Maybe you invested in relationships that made you feel supported instead of depleted. Maybe you finally stopped volunteering for every emergency. Recognizing a behavior that works and choosing to keep doing it means you’re growing as a leader.

Ask yourself: What worked well enough that I want to deliberately repeat it?

One Decision Each

Now look at your four columns. I know it’s tempting to open a blank spreadsheet, but resist building a massive Q4 improvement plan. Choose one from each column. One thing to finish. One thing to stop. One thing to renegotiate. One thing to carry forward. Four decisions. That’s enough. Please don’t create more things to do. Instead, improve the quality of the decisions you make next. 

The first nine months of this year have already given you plenty of information about your ambition, habits, relationships, boundaries, judgment, and priorities. It’s time to use it. You know things now you didn’t know then. Changing your mind when the evidence changes is discernment. And discernment may be one of the clearest signs you’re beginning to lead yourself instead of just managing everything that lands in front of you. 

What are you finishing, stopping, renegotiating, or carrying forward in Q4? Please share in the comments.