I once worked as a first grade teacher’s aide at the Christian school my daughter attended. I was responsible for things like story time, recess, taking the class to and from PE, and facilitating reading groups. So, the 21 students and I had plenty of time to bond (and test my boundaries). By the middle of the school year, we knew each other well enough to have fun together. For example: Everyday I picked the students up from lunch. When they saw me at the door with my hand raised, they formed a single line in front of me. After a quick head count, I asked in drill sergeant style, “Where do your lunch boxes go?” They replied, “To the left, to the left!” To which I responded, “Everything you own in a box to the left!” (song credit: Beyonce.) And off we went back to class. One day after witnessing this spectacle, the headmaster stopped us in the hall outside the lunchroom. I anticipated a reprimand, but instead he complemented me on my unique leadership style. I said, “Sir, I’m not a leader. I’m just trying to get their right hands free to hold onto the stair railing.” He said, “Mrs. Humphreys, look behind you. You literally have 21 people following you. Like it or not, you are a leader.” The moral of the story? Official titles don’t matter. If people follow you then you are a leader. Are you a reluctant leader? You are if you have these qualities:
You make decisions – If people ask you “What do you think of ______?” then you are a leader. In situations where a group decision has to be made, I look around at the people who outrank me and see if they are going to decide. If no one speaks up, I ask some questions to spur brainstorming. If that doesn’t spark a decision, I throw out some options; sometimes even suggest a course of action. Does that sound like something you’ve done? Then you are a leader.
You are a servant – A good leader is actually a servant. She is kind, humble, and generous. She puts the best interests of her team or organization before her own. A good leader can’t be selfish. Taken to the extreme, a selfish leader is a dictator. People end up either miserably following him or quitting. If you have found yourself in a situation where you could not do your job until Mary did hers, then helped Mary finish her task (but didn’t do it for her), then you are a leader.
You know what motivates people – A good leader knows both what motivates those around her and what their strengths are. Then she plays to those things. For example: John has just been put in charge of coordinating the department’s presentation to the client, but you know he works better solo than in a group. So you quietly remind your manager that John is an Excel ninja and suggest he be reassigned to chart the Year-To-Date statistics for the presentation instead. You played both to John’s strength and the manager’s motivation for an excellent presentation. Guess what? You are a leader.
But what if you don’t want to be a leader? It’s too much responsibility, You don’t feel like you’re a good role model. Yada, yada, yada. Suck it up, Buttercup. Like it or not, you’re a leader so be a good one. Start with small acknowledgements to yourself that you lead your family, your team at work, your crew of volunteers at church, etc. Be aware of how you treat others. Start with just being kind. Have your people’s backs. Encourage them with compliments on tasks well done. It’s not all bad, it’s not always difficult, and it can be rewarding. As John Quincy Adams said, “If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”
What other qualities do leaders have in common? Share your thoughts here: